Christmas 2015

I love Christmas time. I love decorated houses and Christmas music and parties and friendship and presents and stories and Christmas cards. It’s crazy, and I get overwhelmed because there are so many things to do. There are rehearsals and concerts and parties and cleaning before and cleaning after and family get-togethers. Schedules get out of hand and feelings are sometimes hurt and kids are overtired and parents are overtired and wow do I get tired of wrapping presents. But I still love it. Even through the chaos, I enjoy the joy.

But there’s something so much more important going on behind this season. I see what’s going on in the world, and I read what people are blogging about and facebooking about and tweeting, and I’m saddened. So many are so lost. And I’m guilty. I’m so busy with so much that is so unimportant.

I don’t know how to say this gently. Well, I do know how to but I just don’t want to. I want to shout it and be crazy and hold a sign on the corner and yell. There is a God. And there is a Son. And He’s real. And He’s loving. And forgiving. And He is IN CONTROL and no news events are shocking to Him. And yes He is grieved by events and still in control because He’s allowed us to make our own choices and so many of us are NOT choosing Him but then we’re so far away from the choice we can’t see that that is the real problem. Yes, Virginia, GOD IS FIXING THIS. But in order for you to see it, first you have to invite Him to fix you! It’s not guns or gays or guerillas that are ruining the world. It’s you! It’s me! We are broken! And the one person who will make us un-broken is the one person who we continue to reject. I have seen changed lives. MY life has been changed!!! I have felt supernatural peace in the middle of terrifying circumstances. I have felt His Presence and His love and I want you to feel it, too.

You have rejected Him. And I know it’s my fault. It’s the church’s fault. We are not good ambassadors for Him. We are selfish and self-absorbed. We like our own. We have made human ritual far more important that human lives. We are calloused and cynical, and we like security and comfort. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that you’ve been hurt. That I’ve hurt you either by my indifference or by my silence or by my animosity. But it’s not Jesus. He is reaching out to you. Sometimes supernaturally, but more often through broken messengers. You are so loved. He is calling you and alluring you and wanting desperately to comfort you and fix you. Jesus wept over Jerusalem, wanting to gather it to Him as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings. I so want you to be gathered up like that. Not so we can be the same or so I can see you become like me or become like something I approve of. Jesus embraces you exactly as you are right now, with all your issues. I know this is true because He embraced me with all my issues and He continues to love me through all my issues.

The change in my life wasn’t liberal to conservative. That’s not what He cares about. The change in my life was lost to found, blind to seeing, dead to alive. He is teaching me, always teaching me, to see Himself in His creation, and to love it because of His love in it. To see His beauty in every creation, every creature. And to grieve for and care for others because I love Him so much and He is there. I am slow and stupid and I can’t express what I really, truly want to express and I’m sorry for that, too. But I just want you to hear from me now and every time I see you His voice. I want Him to speak through me and I beg for Him to open your ears to hear Him.

That’s my Christmas wish for 2015. And 2016. And 2017…

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